The more secure we become in who we are the less subject we are to the opinions others express about us. I agree that pride is sometimes a defense mechanism, and I would say that self respect is not pride. Hostility is often based in fear and sometimes that fear is legitimate- but that does not justify the hostility. Hostility is a method of dealing with issues that inolves no faith, and faith works by love.
All of these things are comlpex and we cant just figure them out and fix them so we have to trust God, develope patience, etc.
I hav found that security over time through my relationship with God and surving threatening experiences by His grace.
I have seen this scenario unfold over and over again…
A person has a problem with another person over whatever issue, valid or not.
They express their disagreement in such a way that it immediately creates a new issue that obliterates the first.
Hostility often creates issues that exceed the point over which the hostility began, as does arrogance, disrespect, etc.
In the first persons mind, the second person is “stubborn, unwilling to listen, wrong, etc”
But the second person is reacting to being devalued, disrespected, condescended to, etc.- even more than the issue at hand.
What results is total futility.
So how we communicate is an issue that often becomes greater than what we are discussing, and if we are indifferent to that, we become ineffective for one thing, and also we may become greater offenders than the offenders we offend ;o)
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That’s quite a line![/size]
George McDonald gives me hope 