Same here.
The concept that “There is no obvious reason why God would draw the point of no return at death (or anywhere at all)” is a negative rationale, like an argument from silence. It’s suggestive, but it isn’t the same as having positive reasons to believe that God doesn’t draw a point of no return–whereas scriptural language (not counting metaphysical rationales of various quality) can easily look as though God draws a point of hopeless condemnation.
Rectifying the situation, in any logically coherent way, requires:
1.) checking to see if the apparently positive scriptural indications of final hopelessness are really saying what they’ve been read to say (and/or if the scope is really as extreme as required for annihilation or ECT);
2.) checking to see if the metaphysical rationales for non-universalism are really holding water;
3.) checking to see if there are positive scriptural indications for post-mortem hopefulness (without neglecting relevant contexts, of course);
4.) checking to see if there are positive metaphysical rationales for post-mortem hopefulness (keeping in mind that they may not necessarily have to sound complicated and technical);
5.) (very closely related to 2 & 4) making absolutely dang sure that whatever idea about condemnation is being promoted does NOT contravene the more fundamental theology being promoted in your church.
So, for some relatively simple and straightforward examples of each:
1.) the word for ‘punishment’ in the Judgment of the Sheep and Goats, is a term borrowed from agriculture to mean a brisk hopeful cleaning. The same concept is frequently used elsewhere in scripture in positively hopeful or at least non-hopeless fashions, such as in Rom 11 where St. Paul talks about branches being grafted out of the vine and then being grafted back in.
1.1.) the term often translated as “ruling” in RevJohn 19 (where Christ will be ‘verb-ing’ the rebel kings of the world with a rod of iron), is actually “shepherding” in Greek: a term which is always elsewhere loving and hopeful even where punishment is involved.
2.) the rationale that “pure spirits are locked into their fates” fails on several counts. Where does this rationale itself come from? (often unstated) Lucifer and other rebel angels clearly were not locked into their fates!–or they couldn’t have rebelled! (Possibly counterrebutted if the rebel angels are not considered to be originally spiritual, or even mythologically non-existent.) After the resurrection of the good and the evil, the ‘spirits’ are no longer unembodied, mooting this rationale in any case. (Possibly counterrebutted if, against scriptural testimony, the evil are not resurrected along with the good; or if bodily resurrection for anyone is doctrinally denied.)
3.) That last chapter in RevJohn, plus lead-ins from the previous chapter, actually shows post-mortem evangelization continuing hopefully on (with at least some successes, notably those kings of the world who last we saw were being scattered by Christ for the vultures to eat!) Unfortunately, the scene is rendered as a poetic portrait, which somewhat obscures what’s happening: the pieces have to be put together to ‘see’ the whole shape at once.
4.) God is essentially love; God is not (even also) essentially wrath. God has to be doing love to a person, even when doing wrath to the person; and He can stop doing wrath–but God cannot stop doing love any more than He can stop acting as God while still essentially being God.
5.) Does a theory of hopeless damnation involve souls continuing to exist completely separated and apart from God, while the more fundamental theology also teaches that God is omnipresent and that nothing exists ‘beside’ Him (i.e. in independence from Him, without Him acting to keep their existence going)? Then the theory instantly fails. Or the more basic theology is wrong. They cannot both be correct.
5.1.) Does a theory of annihilation involve the person ceasing to exist to be loved by God Who is essentially love? Then that theory of annihilation must fail; or else the more basic theology is wrong. They cannot both be correct.
Bonus simplistic observation (combining a bunch of tactics above): ‘Jesus’ means ‘God saves’ or ‘God is Salvation’. We are strenuously warned that we will not be saved so long as we deny the name of Jesus. So, who here denies God finally saves? Raise your hand! (Hint: universalists don’t have to raise their hands.)