Not long after I posted the OP, I was going through my journal and ran across one of my ‘letters from God’ that I wrote down a couple months ago that speaks to all of this, or at least some of it does I think. Thought I might share it, as it may encourage others here as it has encouraged me.
Here it is:
Child Of Longing,
I hear the cries of your heart. I always have, I always will, and I will answer.
Life does not always go as you planned it, or wished it to, but trust in me, and you will have strength, and life, for today, and for tomorrow.
Remember that I am your strength, and I am your refuge, and no storm can capsize your soul, for I am your captain, and I will lead you and guide you to shore.
When you look up at the stars at night, you find them beautiful, and they are, my son.
One of the reasons I made men was so someone could look up and appreciate, and contemplate, my handiwork, and this brings me great joy.
But I want you to know that when I have completed my work in you, you will shine even brighter than the stars.
The light within you is more beautiful, more powerful, than any light you may see in the heavens.
I know that you often feel weak and small, in this big world, in this vast universe, and that even now you sometimes feel afraid, afraid of me, or afraid of yourself, afraid that your hopes will be dashed, your dreams shattered, or that your longing will go unanswered or will lead you nowhere.
I understand your fears, and I know the weight of them.
But fear not, little one, fear not.
There is strength and greatness in you that you can’t yet see, for I have not made you to be nothing or no one, but to be something, and someone.
I have made you to be a vessel of my love and my light, and I have made you to be my son.
And you need not be afraid of me, for I know the plans that I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, and as I have said before, and do not mind repeating, I am your hope, and your future, and your home.
And you need not be afraid of yourself, for my light is greater than any darkness there is in you, and that darkness will not remain forever, you can be assured of that, for I am at work.
And your hopes and your dreams are safe and secure in my hands. Some of these I will fulfill in time, and others not, but only because I have something better in mind for you, something that would bring you even greater joy.
And the longing, the aching, that you sometimes feel, I share in it, and one day you will be able to see and understand how I have, and how deeply I have, shared in it.
And the burdens that you carry, those that care for you may seek to share them, to share the load, but as fellow human beings, they can only do so much.
But there is far more that I can do.
Remember that I am always with you, and always for you.
- joyously yours, Papa