I propose some re-translations of certain scriptures for those who would like to retain their belief in everlasting conscious torment. I’m sure you can squeeze these meanings out of the Hebrew and Greek somehow. Hey, worse translations have been undertaken!
“For his anger lasts [forever], but his favor lasts [forever for some as long as they stay true, or were lucky enough to be pre-selected]; weeping may remain for[ever for most], but rejoicing comes in the morning, [for the frozen chosen].”
~Psalm 30:5
“I [will] accuse forever, [and] will I always be angry, for then the spirit of man [will] grow faint before me–the breath of man that I have created.”
~Isaiah 57:16
“Say to them, 'As surely as I live, declares the Sovereign LORD, I take [lots of] pleasure in the death of the wicked, [if they don’t] turn from their ways and live. Turn! Turn from your evil ways! Why will you die, O house of Israel? [But if you don’t, it’s okay, I’ll enjoy watching you burn.]”
~Ezekiel 33:11
“I have sworn by my own name; I have spoken the truth, and I will never go back on my word: Every knee will bend to me, and [most] tongues will [refuse to confess allegiance to me, and therefore get the whip on their backs.]”
~Isaiah 45:23
“For God so loved [all those special people he selected from scattered points on the globe] that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
~John 3:16
“But I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw [special representatives from every culture] to myself [so I look really egalitarian, even though I picked most to suffer in hell forever].”
~John 12:32
“What do you think? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not [say, “Screw it, I got most of 'em, so one sheep isn’t all that important”? But usually it’s that 99 sheep have wandered away and only one sheep is left. But he’s kinda lazy, so] he is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that [did] wander off. In the same way your Father in heaven is [so lackadaisical that he’ll let people screw themselves if they go too far.]”
~Matthew 18:12-14
“For just as through the disobedience of the one man [everyone, like ever] were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man [a minimal proportion, indicated by the use of the same word “many” but totally not comparable except in some remote, abstract, metaphorical sense] will be made righteous.”
~Romans 5:19
"This is why we work hard and continue to struggle, for our hope is in the living God, who is [theoretically] the Savior of all people [but really just the Savior] of all believers."
~1 Timothy 4:10
"For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, and through him to reconcile to himself all things [in a general sense, excluding most of humanity, of course], whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross."
~Colossians 1:19-20
"For God has imprisoned all in disobedience so that he may be merciful to all [by giving them an option that only some can choose, since he obviously decides who gets out of the prison he’s made.]"
~Romans 11:32
"I hold the keys of death and Hades [but that doesn’t mean that someone can’t take them away from me and lock themselves up and swallow the key.]"
~Revelation 1:18
"And God placed all things under his feet [except for free will. God can’t do anything about that because He’s not always very good at persuading.]"
~Ephesians 1:22
Anymore suggestions? This is kinda fun.