Hi Scott,
It’s a tricky situation that you’re in. I’ll remember you in my prayers. Here’s a little background on myself, which hopefully will be an encouragement or might spark some ideas.
The local Presbyterian church I attend has fairly close ties to the Sydney Anglicans (e.g. we get the Jensen’s to talk at our conferences and send a lot of our young men/women to Moore College). Anyway, about 10 years ago I started looking into universalism (before the term EU existed) and after unsuccessfully debating it with the leaders for awhile, felt I had no option but to say, “given what I have, (i.e. a few philosophical ideas about love and only the NIV bible) I feel I can’t be confident enough of universalism to hold the position”
After backing down, I pretty much gave up on the idea, until my cousin (Luke on this forum) invited me to watch the movie “Collision” (a debate between Christopher Hitchens & Douglas Wilson). I picked up on some side point Douglas made about some passages being fulfilled by the fall of Jerusalem. I asked Luke what that view was, and he explained optimistic postmillennialism to me. That position seemed way better than what I thought I had to believe (premillennialism) and so I decided I would hold it. Over the next month or so, the more I thought about God achieving much more than we could imagine, the hope of universalism rekindled. My dad pointed me to Keith DeRose’s article on universalism, which pointed me to Talbott & Parry’s books. Once I read Talbott’s book, I started in earnest to debate it with Luke on his blog and after I finished reading Parry’s book I was convinced! By God’s grace, one of the opponent’s of universalism on his blog, accidentally pointed this forum out to me
Anyway, that was all at the end of last year. As time went one, especially as sermons dealt with UR passages (i.e. most of the Bible it seems ) I felt more and more uncomfortable with just toeing the line, when in my head I was disagreeing with them, it felt dishonest. One of the members at the house church (which had been meeting at my house), decided to blog about reasons to leave a church and reasons to be kicked out . It seemed the perfect opportunity to “test the waters”, so I anonymously asked what he thought of EU… After a bit of intense anonymous debate where he condemned it, I felt I couldn’t just go to church that Sunday and sit in the same lounge room and keep a straight face. So I told him when I saw him at a evangelistic rally during the week. It was such a relief!! What’s more he laughed and gave me a hug so I knew I wasn’t rejected. Feeling elated, I went and told pretty much everyone I came across that evening, including my ministers and the Moderator General of the Presbyterian church of Australia, who happened to be at the event. Amazingly he didn’t call down fire but actually listened to me, whilst telling me he didn’t think it was biblical .
So I thought it was all good… however, later that week (or the next?) I got a call from my ministers and they said some people had complained about me and were getting upset Anyway we had a 1.5h meeting in which I roughly explained EU and they agree to meet up with me and talk me through my crisis of faith (that’s the way I perceive they see it, but I might be wrong). I gave them both copies of Parry’s book, which they agreed to read. However, they asked me not to talk to anyone at church (except the ministers & my family) about it or on Twitter or on FaceBook The only places I was allowed to discuss it was this forum, and on my cousin’s blog. To keep the peace and out of respect for their authority, I agreed.
A few weeks passed and I thought things were going ok. But one day at work, I was told over the phone that the minister wanted to come visit me that evening and that I was going to have to move church (within the same parent church, just to another house church)!! That was full-on, especially for my wife who was about 8 months pregnant. During the meeting it came out that the other members of my house church weren’t comfortable with me being there (although I had never said anything about EU during any meeting or study) as they felt it was lurking behind the scenes Anyway, I pointed out that that wasn’t sufficient grounds for discipline and that technically the Presbyterian church hasn’t outlawed EU anywhere (it’s only been around for a few years and we move slowly ). Again to keep the peace, we said we would voluntarily move to another house church (although my wife wasn’t sure she even wanted to stay with the parent church!).
The new house church is going well, although I still feel like an outsider, not because they aren’t friendly, but because I feel I can’t say what I believe and speak about what’s important to me. Also when they say things like “isn’t God loving” or “isn’t He full of grace”, it grinds, as I know they are Calvinists and therefore are limiting God so much.
Some FB friends have been bagging out Bell, and I felt I could let that go (after standing up for Bell but feeling a little guilty I was being disobedient) so fortunately I got permission to defend (although not proclaim) EU on FB at least
I also debate via email with my ministers whenever they look at a EU passages in a sermon.
I don’t know what’s going to happen next. The ministers have both read the book, and we met up for about 4 hours total now, discussing EU & related topics. I’m trying hard to be patient. I don’t know what they will do once they establish that I’m not just going through a crisis of faith and refuse to embrace ECT ever again!
Typing all that has given me some time to think about your situation If you’re able, work with the leaders and try to convince them that it’s at least not heretical (i.e it might be mistaken but that’s not a reason for excommunication!). Ask them to at least read Parry’s book and understand/consider the view properly. Personally, for the sake of other EUs, I’m nervously considering (if put under pressure to leave) taking the matter to the General Assembly. i.e. I don’t think they have solid biblical grounds to reject EU.